How To Sober Up Quickly From A Cannabis Haze
Estimated 5-minute read
Let’s Sober Up From Marijuana ASAP!
Okay, picture this situation: you planned a good afternoon of chilling with a big bowl of your favorite blend of cannabis, you even chose a movie from our lists to watch while you are high as a kite, and even got a good variety of snacks and drinks to enjoy at your leisure. All in all, it was a pretty good chill, and now you (and maybe whoever you are with at the moment) are submerging themselves in a pleasant haze… the emergency came.
What the emergency is doesn’t matter (maybe your mom called and it's on her way for a surprise visit, maybe the toilet plumbing busted and water is filling the bathroom quickly, maybe your dog ate a brownie and you need to take him to the vet), but whatever the case, you need to sober up. Fast. Right now. What to do?
You probably remember that time you actually had to sober up, and tons of advice were given to you. So, in the spirit of helping a fellow stoner in need, we offer you the best methods to sober up quickly, and give your full attention (and mind!) to the emergency at hand. Good luck and be safe!
A cold shower.
Classic advice for when you need to sober up, and one that mostly holds up. Is simple really: a splash of cold water clears the mind like there’s no tomorrow, so for a quick fix, it may work. However, keep in mind that this method doesn’t last too long, for not even an hour later, the weed haze may still linger, which could be important depending on the emergency you want to attend. But if it is something with low stakes, go for it. Scrub the weed smell too, while you are at it.
Drink and eat. A lot.
While we are still on the topic of water, keeping yourself hydrated is also one of the sure bets to go down from your weed high. Much like being drunk, having something in your stomach helps to regain your normalcy, just be careful to choose the right snacks to munch on. Sugary stuff, be it drinks or sweets, are not going to help you, the weed interacts badly with it.
Choose more salty stuff, like chips or peanuts, or whatever you have at hand, drinking abundant water during all of this. It will also help you keep grounded, and calm down if you are feeling anxious after the high, and the emergency you need to attend. Keep on munching!
Keep some peppercorn in your pantry.
A somewhat more medical advice (although, keep in mind, we are not expertes, so also ask a real doctor if you should do this), and one that many potheads swear by, is eating a handful of peppercorn right away. Yes, ungrinded pepper. You could also put it in something you are snacking on, we guess, but grabbing a fistful of peppercorn and eating straight away is more dramatic.
Anyway, we say it’s somewhat more medical because, the legend goes, the terpenes of pepper block the effect of THC, so munching on some can potentially cut your high immediately. Again, we advise you to ask a doctor before trying this, but if your pantry is well stocked with spices, then you may already have the remedy you are looking for. Just don’t sneeze!
Bite a lemon. C’mon, just do it!
Well, you could also make some lemonade, but we are trying to bring you down again fast, so go to your fridge and grab the biggest lemon you have. The terpenes contained in the lemon can balance the THC on your body; it is not as potent or immediate as the peppercorn remedy, but it can help you in a pinch.
On the same note, pine seeds have the same effect. Yes, the pinene in those things that fall from pines, and then you hang in a different pine during Christmas, can help you sober up if the situation calls for it. Whatever helps you to leave that high as soon as possible!
Yes, we know that exercising after getting high is pretty much the opposite of what you want to do after lighting a joint, but extreme circumstances call for extreme measures. It also works similarly to when you need to expel caffeine from your body: you sweat it out. It also helps with the anxiety that might build up in your body after a big high, as well as grounding you and letting you think more clearly. Also, watching a stoned person trying to do pilates is very funny, so you will also entertain your friends if you weren’t alone in your chill session. Anyway, when in doubt, get jogging, it will help you a lot.
Get help from a non-stoned friend.
And everything on this list somehow fails, never hesitate to reach for help. It’s a good idea to always have someone you trust in speed dial, and letting them know you are going to be indisposed and probably unreachable while you get high. So no matter how bad you are, just grab the phone and call someone who can handle the situation. You’ll owe them a pizza or something bigger (depending on the nature of the emergency), but knowing you have a friend watching your back no matter what can also ease anxiety and help you calm down. You can laugh about it later!
So there you have it, some very foolproof solutions for the rare situation when getting high was a bad idea. Just remember to always have a plan in mind before lighting up, keep remedies on hand if you need to sober up, and be responsible with your weed sessions: those are for keeping you safe!
So if you liked this article, please share it with the pothead in your life that might benefit from this life-saving advice, and remember to grab one of our great grinder on your way out. Happy chilling!